Before I was officially diagnosed with cancer I was a wreck waiting for test results. The waiting period was awful. Many who had been through a similar situation said the waiting was the most unnerving part. Once you knew what you were dealing with, you could have a plan of action. The unknown; not knowing exactly what was going to happen and how it would be treated was frightening. I imagined all of the “worst case scenarios”. At the age of 53, I know people who have experienced those worst case scenario situations. But, worrying over them, did me no good.
I feel very much like that now. We know what we are dealing with, mostly. But there are still a lot of unknown components. It is easy for my mind to go to the “worst case scenario”. Down the rabbit whole as they say. Only now, I am not just worried about me and my daughter, I am worried about my family and friends, our town, state and country. Even our world! It is an easy yet paralyzing path to go down.
When my mind starts thinking those negative, frightening thoughts, I start singing to myself in my head “Stop in the Name of Love”. That is as far as I go to stop the overwhelming thoughts. And I focus on the love. I focus on the good. I focus on the helpers, as Mr. Rogers said, and in this crisis there are so many brave helpers. I focus on what is in my control – my attitude, my diet, exercise, my home. I focus on the laughing, loving moments I have with my daughter.
Pick out a song that will help you STOP the crazy thoughts. Maybe “Don’t Stop Believing” by Journey. That brings back wonderful memories for me. It was my first concert. Or maybe a song that will make you sort of laugh at this bizarre situation such as “Can’t Touch This” or “Don’t Stand So Close To Me”. Maybe you need a spiritual song – “We Shall Overcome”. Or a tune from Broadway – “The Sun Will Come Out Tomorrow”.
I also LOVE Pandora. It is sort of an online radio station. Check it out at Pandora.com. You can sign up for free if you agree to listen to a commercial every few songs. The nice thing about Pandora is you can create stations and it plays similar music. I love Christian music and often listen to K-Love on the radio. So I set up a K-Love station. It plays all my favorite contemporary Christian music. I also have a James Taylor station. Both ease my soul. When I started listening to the James Taylor station and Alison Kraus songs started playing, I was so happy. I had forgotten how much I loved her music. That is the beauty of the station approach, it can reconnect you to artists you listened to in the past or introduce you to new artists.
Whatever it is, stop the negative “what if” thoughts and focus on the love. Focus on doing what you can. Stop…in the name of love.
Finding the Ability to focus on the love.
Finding Abilities 